Lonely feeling

It was a wierd feeling today to wake up in a completely empty house (not including the dog) and I wondered...why is it that I can't really remember living like this? It wasn't that long ago that this was what it was like when Matt was at work...just me and Bailey. But I can't remember it...life before and without Kellen just seems hazy...a blur.

It was a really early morning (alarm going off by ~ 3:30 AM). I was waiting to meet my ride at 5:00 AM...and we were in Galveston by a little after 8:00 AM...the presentations went well - I don't think I have any student prospects out of this trip, but perhaps some seeds were planted. The folks down at the Galveston campus like to really roll out the red carpet for us, and today was no exception - they took us out to eat for a snazzy seafood lunch and I'm still full from all of the appetizers, seafood gumbo, and shrimp pasta that I had! They really spoil us on these trips!

Day care mystery

Well...Kellen has the folks at school stumped...on Monday, yes-his first day in his new class, he got a horrible cut on his cheek...about 2 or 2 1/4 inches long...right on the top of his cheek, under his eye, and stretching virtually to his ear/hairline. Well, when he did this/it was done to him - the exact details of this incident remain a mystery to all except Kellen, and his story changes each time it's told - he apparently did not cry, run to the teachers, yell, raise a ruckus, you get the picture. So, as a result of his apparent silence, the teachers weren't aware that he was injured until some time later, at which point in time they tried, to no avail, to determine what exactly had happened. Obviously, no such luck. When I arrived at school to pick him up, the teacher was incredibly apologetic, and I tried to ask Kellen what had happened as well...I got the same two stories out of him that the teachers had gotten, plus a brand new one! Oh boy!

We're keeping antibiotic ointment on it in hopes that it won't scar, but we'll just have to wait and see on that one I guess. He and I had talked about not touching his boo boo (I'm trying to get him NOT to scratch it...), and have been putting the ointment on it in the morning before school and then at night before bed, and have left instructions for the school to keep it on him as well. But he knows he isn't supposed to touch it because we've talked about it. When one of the teachers came into his class to put his medicine on his face, he responded to her with, "No, don't touch my boo boo! Mommy said we no touch the boo boo!" Apparently he was really cute about it...and it just cracked her up with how sweet and emphatic he was about not touching his face. She finally convinced him that his Mommy said it was ok and that she was just going to put the medicine on it like Mommy did.

Ok...so fast forward to tonight...I went to meet MawMaw because I have a work trip tomorrow and he's going to stay with MawMaw and PawPaw for a few days...Sidenote: I'm not sure who's more excited about this arrangment...the kid or the grandparents! Anyway...he was so sweet in the restaurant! At one point in time, he just looked at me, stroked my hair, and said, "Beautiful hair, Mommy. Beautiful hair. I want to kiss it." Then leaned over and just kissed my hair. Ohmygoodness.....For those of you wondering...yes, tears did well up in my oh-so-emotional eyes and I just wanted to hold him and squeeze him forever! What a blessing!

Waitin' for paint to dry

Well...as the title might indicate, we're actually moving forward on the bathroom project. YEAH! *Happy Dance* (and sore back tomorrow, I'm sure!) Matt finished the sanding yesterday morning and I damp wiped the walls to clean them off after the dust had settled somewhat. Started on the first coat of Kilz primer this morning and the first coat took a little longer than I had anticipated, but that's ok! Let that dry really well, caulked a little bit and smoothed that out, and on to the second coat...trying really hard to cut in on the edges, etc...[note: I am obviously NOT a painting pro]. As it stands right now, I've cut in again and am waiting on Matt to sand down some areas that need it...then I'll do another whole third coat, let it dry, and then it's onto COLOR!!! Our initial thought for the painting technique won't work, so I'm going to scour the DIY network to get some ragging painting techniques (scary thought, isn't it??). But we're moving on it and I'm seeing PROGRESS!!!

6:00 PM Update...The final (I think!) sanding is completed, and the 3rd coat of Kilz primer is on the walls. After looking at the DIY network website and then again at what we had initially purchased for our painting technique, I am thinking that it will actually work...they have included an edging tool in the package (smart folks), which is what I was concerned about...so...I think Matt and I have decided that we'll let this primer get good and dry and the color will go on tomorrow after work. Whoo hoo!

(I know this blog may be incredibly boring to some...but for those of you who are regular readers, you'll understand why I feel the need to include this project update *grin*)

My son the flirt...

Our little man is a flirt, and last night he ended up with a busted lip because of it...now let me explain. We went to the Aggie baseball game (and there's another funny story when I told Kellen we were going to the Aggie Baseball game that I'll write in a second), but he had such a great time during the game (except for the last inning and a half...it was an hour and a half past his bedtime and he was just ready to go...didn't misbehave, he just said he was ready to go and was tired and laid on my shoulder). But anyway...there were two girls and a guy sitting behind us and he decided that he was going to flirt with them...played with them and talked with them for a while, and then in the midst of flirting with them he tried to duck underneath the metal bleacher and hit his lip on the seat and busted it...good. What a ham!

So the other story...We were riding in the car when I told him that we were going to go home and get ready to go to the Aggie baseball game and he looks at me and says, "Watch the dancers?!"

Ummm...wrong sport sweetie! "No Kellen, that's Aggie basketball. We're going to watch baseball."

Three times we repeated this exchange, with all three time ending in him asking for the dancers. So does it surprise anyone that the night ended with him flirting with two girls sitting behind us???

Unfortunately we didn't pick up a "W" last night, but hopefully tonight will be better.

Backtrack to Thursday...Uncle Jonathan, Gramma & Grampa came to visit for Uncle Jonathan's birthday and we just had such a good time all day! They timed their arrival so that Grampa could make breakfast, which is always a treat, then Mommy and Grampa went to the store and got things for lunch. I think that Kellen played with just about every toy that he owned! The gang watched a couple of movies, and just enjoyed each others company...such a nice visit!

Potty man & tattle tale

Some days I really feel like we're making progress on this potty thing...then other days...well.

Kellen cracked me up on the way to school this morning...He had me wondering if Matt had gotten pulled over for speeding, because he asked me to "go fast like Daddy" and then said something about Daddy getting in trouble. I asked him if Daddy had gotten in trouble while he was with him...and asked him if Daddy had gotten pulled over by a policeman. He told me yes and nodded his head very seriously...I called Matt and asked him about it...told him that his little boy was trying to tattle on him. Matt laughed and said that Kellen had asked him to go fast, too, but that he had told Kellen no because that could get him in trouble and Kellen didn't want Daddy to get in trouble, right? Well, apparently the poor little guy just got all kinds of confused.

He's moving to the next class up in school on Monday, so tomorrow is really his last day in Ms. Christy's classroom and she's not taking it well. When Matt picked Kellen up from school yesterday and got his stuff from her room, I guess he mentioned something to her about it and she got upset, again...She's commented to us several times that she's really going to miss him and that he's one of her favorites, which is something that I'm sure she's not supposed to say. I made sure that I took a picture of Kellen today for her...one of his fall school pictures that is just oh-so-cute! He's going to have major adjustment issues as well, so I'm really not looking forward to that next week. He really likes Ms. Rhanda, but Ms. Christy has her own special spot in the nightly "bless" (prayer) time...he blesses his teachers and friends and then blesses Ms. Christy on top of that...We'll have quite the adjustment on this one!

Outta' whack

Outta whack is apparently what I am...and I'm not talking about my psychological self, for those of you wondering. *grin* After a conference in mid-February when a 10 minute massage that felt oh-so-good left me concerned because the masseuse indicated that my C1 was out of alignment, I was referred to a chiropractor and have been going to this Dr for the past week...after seeing the x-rays that she took...I concur...I'm outta' whack! My back x-rays look HORRIBLE! Nothing broken that a surgery could fix, but definitely misalignment issues that desperately need to be addressed. No wonder I almost always seem to be aching! She feels like many of my current issues (back pain, shoulders, lower back, etc., as well as my TMJ & migraines could all be connected). Finally...someone else that seems to think holistically...Matt laughed when I said that...I guess chiropractors are known for that philospophy...but anyway...she also gave some credibility to some other symptoms that I was having that had been dismissed by others, so that made me feel like I wasn't going crazy...just that my biomechanics are completely outta' whack and causing a host of problems that need to get fixed.

Anyway...I did a treatment on Tuesday, Thursday, and again on Friday...set up this next week for Monday, Wednesday & Friday...In her words, "We should have been friends a long time ago."

Wish me luck through this journey...I'm having to fight many of my bad habits, since I regularly pop my back (it's been out of alignment for so long that I guess I've just gotten in the bad habit of doing that...and I've been told I MUST stop) I'm now realizing just how often I actually did that! Who knew? (Other than everyone around me?!) I've always thought that I've been kind to my back since my wreck in high school, but apparently, that hasn't been good enough...or maybe it would be a WHOLE lot worse if I wasn't aware of my tendency for back issues...Who knows! Let's just pray that we can get me straightened out - Literally - quickly.

Date night...the grandparents version

This was just too cute...and I had to share...do you think they missed their grandson?

Written in an email from MawMaw this morning....

'We finally kidnapped the kid!

If only for a short while. We went to CS when Dad got home from shooting. Threw Kellen, the bicycle, football, and teeball set into the car, along with Woody and Buzz Lightyear who could not be separated from Kellen.

Spent a couple of hours at the park. He was on the bike for about 3 minutes, hit a few balls, threw the football a few times and the rest was all slidin'! Frontwards, backwards, on his back, on his stomach, sliding down, climbing up! He had a ball and so did we! The we went to Sonic for a Wacky Pack, which he wolfed down - looked like PawPaw eating. He was in a great mood and there was a lot of giggling and laughing. He got a little tiger/lion looking thing that is supposed to velcro on the seat belt - called a "seat-belt buddy). Anyway, we found out it eats hands and hair! How scary! He talks SO grown up now. Brought a tear to our eyes.

Oh yeah, he loved his Cheerios holder - we had a small snack at the park. I'm keeping the fish at my house.

He wanted to "run free" for a little bit so off he went. Headed straight for the soccer goal! Pawpaw showed him how to kick the ball into the goal, but I think he is going to be a goalie. The most fun was dropping Buzz and Woody through the net. "Uh oh, Woody!" "Uh oh, Buzz!"

Got him home and gave him a bath. The plan was to watch Matadgascar (spelling????) and "hold his book from Aunt Boo" but he spotted a Hermie and decided he wanted to watch that, all the while insisting that PawPaw read his new book. PawPaw got a kick out of him "multi-tasking" (or could it be hyper activity?). He would get interested in the book, then realize he was missing the video and peer over the book and then push it down. George would stop reading and he would want him to start again. I know, I know, we should have turned off the video. We did watch part of Mata whatever with Kellen laying on his couch (me hoping he would go to sleep BEFORE Mommy and Daddy showed up, but no luck). He had to be tired but was still in a good mood (around 9:00 by this time. He was a little sad going to bed - didn't want to give kisses or say goodbye, but I think he went to sleep quickly. I didn't hear any crying which would have made MawMaw and PawPaw feel guilty for keeping him up.

Anyway, since our schedule has been SO hectic and will be this week also, we had to settle for a short visit, but we had a great time! Matt and Becca got some stuff down around the house and then went to Snook to use a gift certificate at the steakhouse.'

I make you feel better

We've told Kellen that his hugs help to make us feel better, so after I dozed today and he decided that it was time for me to wake up, he showered me with hugs and after every one, kept saying, "I making you feel better, right Mommy?" It was just the sweetest thing!

I think that he's in the middle of a growth spurt right now...he ate two regular sized pankcakes this morning for a late breakfast (his Pap Pa Gerren would be proud), then snacked on yogurt before nap, finished it off when he woke up, then has eaten a Cheerio cereal breakfast bar, a strawberry fruit breakfast bar, and a Cinnamon Toast cereal breakfast bar. [just for the record - I don't normally let him eat this, but he hasn't been feeling well today and this was a simple solution to a somewhat peaceful food issue for him today] And he's been eating like this (volume-wise) for about a week or week and a half now...just abnormally large portions for him (at one point in time it was normal for him to eat 4 scrambled eggs plus 2 small pancakes for breakfast - NOT KIDDING, but not anymore).

We'll see how long this little spurt lasts and what we end up with afterwards.

Date night

Matt and I had a date night tonight...what fun! I had received a gift certificate to a steak house in Snook for Christmas, and MawMaw and PawPaw were in desperate need of a Kellen-fix, so they came over and took him to the park for a while and watched him while we went out to eat. What a treat! It was a well deserved reward for work well-done today (ok, so we, at least I, didn't get as much done as I wanted to, but we both did get quite a bit done around the house today...and we still have one more day left of the weekend).

Apparently Kellen repeatedly slid down the slide...over and over and over...they had taken his tricycle and baseball set, as well as his football, but he mostly wanted to slide...He just loves that so much!

And, for those of you who were wondering, the renting of Ice Age worked...he's no longer scared of the lion, and I'm still working on getting him to call it a tiger.

Grumpmeister

Grumpmeister...I think that's my nickname for Kellen for this week. He's been such the little grump - and it seems like it's been all week, but I'm sure it just seems like that to me right now because it has been such a rough night. He's 2 1/2...it's normal, he's 2 1/2, it's normal...perhaps if I keep repeating it, it will sink in, I'll remember it and be less frustrated...

I had really wanted to take him to the Night of Champions tonight, but decided pretty quickly against that once he started acting up...Got to daycare and he decided that he wanted a cracker...I didn't have any crackers and neither did his teachers at daycare...but he wanted one anyway...and made sure that everyone was quickly realizing that by getting louder and louder...I quickly picked him up, told him we were going home to get something to eat, and left. Immediately.

Swung by the Kroger pharmacy drive through...then home...on the way I told him that we would go home, get something to eat, take a bath and get ready for bed, then I would let him watch Ice Age, even though it was still a week day...if he behaved...did he want to do that? He said he did, but then said he was tired and wanted to go to bed. THAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN MY FIRST CLUE...MY FIRST WARNING SIGN THAT SOMETHING WAS HORRIBLY WRONG. WHAT WAS WRONG WITH ME THAT I DIDN'T READ THE FLASHING WARNING SIGNALS RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME? I repeated what he had said back to me, asking him if he just wanted to go home and go to bed, he said yes, then said no, that he wanted to go and watch Ice Age. So I said ok, let's go home, eat some pizza (left over from last night), get our bath and watch the movie.

This suddenly was NOT ok with him. He didn't want pizza...he wanted pasta. Then decided pizza was ok since it was pizza or no Ice Age...then at home he decides that he doesn't want milk with his pizza, he wants something else, then milk was ok since it was milk or no Ice Age...then he wanted prune juice, but not in a big boy cup (sorry..all of the other sippy cups are dirty, other than what the milk is/was in)...now the prune juice in the big boy cup is ok since it's that or no Ice Age. He doesn't want his sleeves down, then he doesn't want his sleeves up...and none of these things are simple, soft-spoken requests, but all out tantrums and the world-is-going-to-end fits. Then he spills ALL of his prune juice...all over the table, chair, himself, and the floor. Oh boy.

Bathtime was relatively uneventful...as was potty time before and after the bath. So was getting ready for bed. I think at this point in time he was so wanting to watch Ice Age that just thinking about it was getting him mesmerized...

He really is sweet, he's just 2! But, on the grand scheme of things, I've got it really good! There are some days that I can actually reason with him...using consequences...today was (partly) one of those day...If you don't X, Y or Z...you won't be able to watch Ice Age...not a bribe...just a consequence of an action. And, for the most part, it worked.

By the end of the night, he was fed, bathed, dressed for bed, happy, we had said our prayers, and he had been tucked into bed...having gotten a rare treat (movie during the week) in the meantime. I do love my little man! And just have to remember...he's 2 1/2...he'll eventually grow out of this and I'll look back with fondness at this time and miss it!

Reflection

Matt and I attended the funeral of Mary Jo, the original director of Stepping Stone, Kellen's daycare, today. She was diagnosed with cancer only this past August and passed away on Saturday. Her husband made several poignant comments during the ceremony, to the effect that even if he had the power to bring her back, it would only be selfish to do it, because she's so much better off now...with Jesus and in no pain, and somewhere so perfect that our minds can't even begin to dream or comprehend it. I pray for her family and those closest to her for what they're going through, as I know that I'm still reeling with the shock of it all, as she didn't want anyone (or at least many people) to know about the cancer while she was going through, as she firmly believed that she was going to receive healing until right up until the very end. Her husband also made another point...she now has that healing, just in a different way than she had expected to receive it and they had prayed for it. Anyway, my shock comes from only finding out about her cancer toward the beginning of last week...so everything seems to have gone at such a high rate of speed because I barely had time to comprehend her cancer diagnosis and let that sink in when Matt told me yesterday that they'd posted a sign at daycare that she'd died.

She made Matt and I feel so at ease about our choice of day care centers...any concern that we had was promptly addressed, even something that could be considered trivial. I remember when Kellen was moving to an older classroom and the teachers weren't able to feed him breakfast any longer...he was having to feed himself "big boy" food. I was stumped as to what I was supposed to fix for him (I know this seems really stupid, but I really was stumped...we had been on baby food and mixed cereal for so long and my brain was trying to wrap around the idea of Kellen feeding himself mixed cereal...umm..how 'bout NO, but I hadn't transitioned my brain to him eating other foods). Mary Jo just giggled in a nondemeaning way, and suggested that other parents found it useful to make scrambled eggs, or big batches of pancakes, waffles, etc., and made lots of suggestions for healthy breakfasts that were age appropriate and that wouldn't take all morning to make. Thus I became known as Kellen's mom, the one who brings scrambled eggs and pancakes every morning, for the next at least 6 months (ok, so it was longer than that..but he LOVES them!). Anyway...I don't have any idea of how many kids there actually are at that daycare, but within days she knew our names, which kid we belonged with, and our family situation (Matt's work schedule craziness), etc., and I imagine she did that for every single family at that day care, plus every other day care she oversaw, since she was the area director in addition to the College Station director when we first began there. She was an amazing woman, and I'm so glad that she's no longer in any pain...